On Sunday Valentine’s day I shared on my blog and on my business Facebook page that I don’t celebrate Valentine’s day.
I had someone on my Facebook page that was very upset about the fact that I said I don’t celebrate Valentine’s day.
I think she saw it as a negative.
I know that I don’t need to explain myself, but I’m going to anyway.
This is one of the hardest posts I have ever had to write.
It brings back the memories of a day that changed our lives forever!
My husband and I met many years ago.
I was 16 going on 17, he was 18 going on 19.
Yes, we were childhood sweethearts.
We dated for four years when he finally proposed to me, and we were married two years later.
In 1996 our lives changed forever.
I remember that beautiful April day, it was sunny and just beautiful.
I wasn’t scheduled to work that day, I was a hairstylist.
I was spending my day cleaning and re-decorating.
(yes this is my old house, our family room)
At the time I was a daytime tv watcher.
On that day I was watching Sally Jessy Raphael, followed by Phil Donahue.
Anyway, as I was cleaning, watching tv and redecorating my family room the phone rang.
I answered the phone and it was my Father-in-law.
As he spoke and tried to hold back the tears he told me that my husband had a bad accident.
I asked him what had happened, and all he would say that he’s in pretty bad shape and they took him by ambulance.
(photo taken 4 years ago)
My heart was racing so fast, I thought I was going to faint.
I was shaking, I didn’t know what to do.
He told me that what hospital they took him too.
I was in shock as I hung up the phone.
I sat and cried.
Because of the state that I was in I was afraid to drive in my car, worried that I may have caused an accident.
I called my Dad and told him what happened, and asked if he could come to my house and drive me to the hospital.
Of course he said yes.
While I waited for my Dad to arrive, it felt like an eternity.
You see at this point I had no idea just what happened, and how bad it was.
I was hoping that I was overacting in the way that I was feeling, but my gut kept telling me that it was really bad.
My Father-In-Law couldn’t even tell me on the phone, I kept praying that he was okay and whatever it was that he would survive.
My Dad finally arrive, I ran to his car and as we drove he was asking me what happened.
I told him that I didn’t know, but it sounded really bad and I was so worried.
My husband and I had been married for 6 1/2 years, we would be celebrating our 7th year of marriage June 3, 1996.
We finally arrived at the hospital, and we entered the emergency room.
I asked to see my husband and they told me to have a seat.
The nurse came up to me and said before you see your husband the doctor wants to talk to you.
At that point my heart was racing even more, I thought I was going to get sick.
As I saw the Doctor standing there, next to the Doctor was the hospital Priest.
All I could think of is, my husband is dead!
I kept praying as I approached asking God please, please, not my husband.
They pulled me into a room and told me to have a seat.
They told me that my husband had a very bad accident at work.
His arm had been amputated by a machine at his work.
This machine had a gigantic gear, it pulled my husband in and he had to pull away so the whole machine didn’t take more of him.
The Doctor wanted me to know this before I saw him so I would be prepared for what I would see.
At that moment all that I could think about is that my husband is alive!
He’s alive and he’s going to be okay, I just know it!
I told the Doctor and the Priest that I wanted to see my husband.
I ran as fast as I could, bent over and kissed his for head.
I told my husband how much I love him and that everything is going to be okay.
He smiled and I noticed that his front tooth was missing.
He doesn’t remember how that happened.
My husband then told me how someone that he worked with saved his life, by applying pressure to his wound to stop the blood, so he wouldn’t bleed to death.
The Doctor came into the room and told me that my husband needed to have surgery to close his wounds.
They needed to do a skin graph on his arm, which meant that they had to remove skin from the front of his upper legs for his arm.
As they took him away for his surgery, I kissed him again, told him how much I loved him and that we were going to be okay.
I knew that I had to be strong for him.
With my strength grew his strength.
It was several weeks before he was released from the hospital, he was in so much pain with his arm and his legs because of the skin graphs.
(photo below 10 months after the accident, vacation in Florida)
This was our darkest hour.
We both went through grieving process, because a part of him died.
I hated seeing what he had to go through, and all of the pain that he endured.
It broke my heart to know that so many things that he enjoyed doing, he will never do again.
But, he was alive!
So why am I sharing this story?
Well, we may not celebrate Valentine’s day, or go out to a fancy restaurant on our anniversary.
Heck we don’t even exchange cards on our anniversary, or birthday.
But each and ever single day we hug and tell each other how much we love one another.
After almost losing him, I am more thankful than I was before that life changing day.
And so thankful that he’s in my life.
That day changed our lives forever!
And I know how in the blink of an eye your life can change forever.
He could have been taken that day.
And if he was, our daughter would not be here.
(photo taken on our 25th wedding anniversary, celebrating at our happy place, Disney World)
Each and every single day is a blessing.
And celebrating because it’s a holiday has no meaning.
What’s important is each day we are alive and together.
Every single day, we hug, kiss and say I love you.
Make sure you hug your husband, wife,lover, friend, daughter, son, Mom, Dad…..and tell them how much you love them.
Anne~ Thank you for sharing this story. I know it must have been hard thinking about this scary time in your life. Things that happen in our life really do remind us of how blessed we are to have the people in our lives and the precious time we have with them. Beautiful pictures! ~Linda
Anne:
I’m sorry for the way you were treated because of your mouth. I think you are one beautiful lady, inside & out. I noticed your lip the first time I saw your picture. Because I have people in my family with the same beautiful scar. That does not define you – your great personality shines through on all you blogs and messages and noticing your lip was just a note in passing. My husband and I have been married many more years than you and your husband. But we have never gone to bed mad at each other and we kiss each other good morning and good night every day. Thanks for sharing the scary time in your life. All I can say is, keep up the good work & good blogs. I love reading them and wish I had your energy. You do beautiful work and your decorating makes me wish I had your talent.
Blessings to you & your husband! I received a similar call 5 years ago this past January 23rd. At 7:00 am. on a Sunday on a back country road my husband served to miss a herd of deer. There was a perfectly round shattered circle on the passenger side windshield where his head hit. God was all over it though! We saw His hand in SO many ways. God allowed a newspaper lady running late to discover my husband that early Sunday morning. Even with an open skull fracture he never lost consciousness, which is unheard of. EMT wanted to fly him out but he knew he would never make it so they transported him to a local trauma center. Drs. there gave him a 10% chance of survival. He received numerous transfusions & continued to bleed out. We were taken into a tiny private room with a hospital Chaplin, not knowing what that meant. I now know it was God protecting me & our children. From the skull fracture, broken leg, compartment syndrome on his leg, broken back & losing part of his upper ear, after 33 days in the hospital he went home. It was a true miracle he did not have brain damage. Today we are SO thankful God allowed his complete & FULL recovery! His leg still gives him trouble, but hey, we’ll take it! I am so thankful for your husband’s survival from his terrible accident!!! You are right – every day is a blessing!! May God continue to bless you & your family! P.S. We also were high school sweethearts & 2 children & 33 years later we are thankful our paths crossed!!
That is so touching and such a true miracle. I am so happy your husband lived! XO
Such an uplifting story, n God was watching over your sweet hubby, he saved him so you could have your beautiful daughter n go on with your lives….wonderful, story, thanks for sharing n we never know what tomorrow will bring…so live life to the fullest every single day!!!
Can’t even imagine what you went through! Thank God you all are ok and together. You have so much to be thankful for. This goes to show you why people shouldn’t judge other people, because we don’t always know. Don’t worry about what anyone thinks.
Connie
Thank you for sharing your story. My husband had emergency heart by-pass surgery and I nearly lost him in Nov. of 2006. It also made us aware of our love and that everyday is a gift. We too do not do the routine celebrations as they just seem so commercialized and we feel like we can not lessen our love to that level. 43 years married and blessed with a love that will carry us through whatever life throws our way. I love your posts. You are an inspiration to me personally though I do not know you. We inspire me to be resourceful and re-purpose items and want my home to reflex beauty and love.
I have tears in my eyes as I’m writing this, it’s just such a miracle that your husband lived! I am so happy for you both and I’m sure it was a huge adjustment! But, I would react the same way. Minus an arm? Oh well you have a spare and you are ALIVE and that is all that matters! Sorry, I’m a nurse and we tend to be blunt and even crass at times but honestly as long is his heart is still beating and the brain is still functioning we’re good. Hubby and I have been together for 38 years. We do celebrate Valentine’s Day in a small way, just a rose, a card and my favorite candy bar, lol. But like you, we tell each other several times a day “I love you” and when one of us leaves for work “be careful, have a wonderful day” and show our love in a million little ways. Thank you for sharing and you have a beautiful family!
Dear Anne, my husband and I don’t acknowledge the Hallmark Card Day (February 14th), either. You see, every day is Valentines Day for us. I have had health problems and have learned the following: there is no promise of tomorrow. We also, hug kiss tell each other how much we love each other multiple times a day. I love him more and more every day. Thank you for sharing your story.
Yesterday, I saw you make that comment on Facebook. I knew there was a story behind it. You see, while I was reading your story, my own husband had just totaled his truck down an embankment. His guardian angel was with him, the truck was destroyed but he was only shaken. It truly was a miracle. I’m so glad you and your husband had one, too!
Anne, thank you for sharing your story. You do have a lot to be thankful for!
Thanks so much for sharing your very personal story. I say that’s your business whether you celebrate it or not.
Anne, what a story. I can’t imagine going through a tragedy like that a young age.
I really relate to your reason. However, it’s none of anyones business why you wouldn’t celebrate something. John and I are the same way. My illness isn’t life threatening we celebrate things differently.
Getting diagnosed at a young age with a 98% divorce rate in our mind. John looked my doctor in the face and said I’m not going anywhere.
I’m truly blessed everyday of my life
Cindy
Thank you for sharing your story. I am so happy that you were able to continue your lives together, just a little different. I also, received one of those dreaded calls. In Dec. 2013, I was talking to my husband on the phone while he was at the deer lease, with my son and his wife. Suddenly the phone went dead, I thought that we had just lost the connection. About 30 min. later, my daughter-in-law, called to tell me that my husband had had a heart attack and it did not look good. My son performed CPR on his dad for approximately 30 min., until EMS arrived and they took him to the nearest hospital. Unfortunately, my husband did not survive. I have spent the last 2 years trying to put my life back together, but it is not easy. We were married for over 38 years and I miss him so much. He was my best friend, the father of my children and the love of my life. I never expected to receive a phone call like that, but it sure changed everything in my world. Thanks, Susan
Anne, Thank you so much for sharing such a traumatic and life changing experience.. I’m so glad your husband survived and is thriving! You have a lovely family. God Bless
Anne, thanks so much for sharing your story. I nearly lost my husband several years ago when he was building our “dream” garage. He was two stories up when he slipped and fell to the ground, narrowly missing a brick walkway and a metal fence post. He was bruised, banged up, and bloody but his guardian angel made the trip with him and we will be celebrating 46 years of marriage this coming September. Loving one another and appreciating each day we have together is far more precious and important than celebrating just one day out of the year.
Thankfully I have not received a phone call like that and I hope that I never do. Thank God that your husband only lost an arm. I do not mean to diminish the loss of his arm, but it could have been so much worse. My husband and I do not observe Valentine’s Day either. We refuse to jump through the hoops of commercialism. My husband shows me that he loves me every single day and I never forget how blessed I am to have him.
ANNE, i WAS SO MOVED BY YOUR STORY — AND FROM THE VERY MOMENT i READ its title, I was hooked. I’ll confess to not reading some of your blogs, but this one sounded like I was going to sere a more vulnerable side of you. May God continue to bless you your family!
Whether you celebrate Valentine’s day or not is really not important and is a personal preference. Ones not anymore right than the other. What is important is that you make it a point to value and be thankful for your significant other every day, just not one day out of the year.
Thanks for sharing an emotional story. It sounds like you are both very blessed!
XOXO
Dear Anne, I don’t even know what to say about your tragedy with your husband other that you made it. Many times when we go through such dark times the Lord is saying “you need to know something about your self” that could not have been learned any other way. Much like Abraham in the Old Testament. Life really does throw strong curves to us especially those with great faith as yourself. Thank you for sharing such a personal story it will strength those who need it. In 5 short years, I had 10 major surgery’s, a granddaughter passed, one of my Sons attempted suicide, my marriage was lost to years of physical and emotional abuse, 2 of my 4 children walked out of my life, then I had a complete nervous break down. I am a survivor and I thank the Father for this every day of my life. I don’t have a perfect family or an awesome husband on my arm, but I have learned that I don’t need any of those things to be whole. I am stronger today because of these trials, all because of a loving Father in Heaven who is at the side. Prayer and my faith have kept me a live. Here’s to a great life! xx Jo
*Sniff* Oh my goodness,I’m so happy you had a good ending.
Dear Anne, When I read your story about not celebrating … I knew there had to be more… and may God Bless you for sharing. In my life there have been many heartaches too, but the most incredible thing is how it Leads us to Our Dear Lord! We can only go forward in life .. and appreciate each and every day “for the Gift” that it is! The Love of my life and I will celebrate our 58th this May! I loved the pictures of the Two of you and your daughter! With Love and hugs, Judy
Thank you for sharing with us. I lost my husband and love of my life 24 yrs ago to an accident but I’m so thankful for every minute we had together. That tragedy taught me a lot about life and about myself and I believe we all come through stronger in the end. Continued blessings to you and your family and thanks again for sharing!
Thank you for sharing your love story. Sometimes, the tragic things in life serve to make the bonds we have with one another stronger. My husband and I were married when he was 20 and I was 18. This year will mark our 48th anniversary. We have been through a lot together and are especially close because of that. Our first year of marriage I worried every minute of every day about him as he was a Marine in combat in a place thousands of miles away. To make matters worse for him, less than 2 months after he was deployed, I was broadsided by a drunk man who ran a stop sign and almost killed me. He was not even able to come home to see about me. Praise God, I survived, my husband came home safely and after what was probably the worst year of our life together, we started our family. Enduring love is such a gift and it really is worth more than any other thing we could give or receive. Your love story is a beautiful one!