This is one of the hardest posts I’ve ever had to write. I’ve written this post so many times and with each time that I’ve wrote it I deleted it. Just typing the words harelip or cleft pallet has my heart racing. So you’re probably wondering what in the world I’m talking about. Especially if you’ve been following me for sometime. Well today I’m sharing a secret that I’ve been hiding. It’s something that even though I’m a 50 years old I still have a hard time dealing with.
Here we go. I was born with what I was told was a harelip. I guess they call it a harelip because it resembles a rabbits mouth. Pointed at the top. I really hate that word so much! I’ve had two surgeries. One surgery was when I was an infant. The other was when I was five years old or so. I can’t remember. The second surgery was supposed to make my scar less noticeable and my lip look more shaped like a lip. But the surgeon did a horrible job in my opinion and it looks the same as it did before I had the second surgery done.
Because of my defect, another word I hate, I was bullied quite a bit in school. Yeah, school was pretty much hell for me. From kindergarten all the way until High School I was constantly put down and teased. My parents told me to ignore the haters but it’s hard to ignore people that constantly call you ugly and make fun of the one part of your feature that you hate the most.
One of the best things that happened to me as a teen was meeting my husband. I honestly don’t know how he fell so in love with me but he did. He seemed to not even notice my lip at all. Like it never happened. He was and still is the sweetest guy. I hit the jackpot when I met him.
As an adult I was bullied as well. That’s something that actually hurt more than the kids I went to school with. It was seven years after I graduated High School. I was at a nail salon getting my nails done and the whole time I was getting bullied by the nail techs as they said things like lip liner isn’t going to change the way your lip is, it still looks the same. And so on. Yeah nice huh?
But I’ll tell you something that you probably find hard to believe. I don’t hate any of the people that bullied me. I really don’t. When I think back to those years it hurts me deeply. But I don’t have anger. I guess that’s the funny thing about words. They can cut you like a knife, deep in your soul. Time can pass but those words, those words are still there and no matter how much time goes by they still hurt. So please don’t ever tell your children that words don’t hurt, they do, believe me they do.
I decided to go to beauty school because I always loved messing with my hair and makeup. I think that was one of the best things I did because I was sort of shy in High School. Not the kind of shy that’s afraid to make friends or talk to people. But afraid to look someone in the face for fear that all they will do is look at my different lip. I knew that I would have to work on clients that I would have to be face to face with. This scared the freaking hell out of me. But I did it. I graduated from beauty school and started my career. I was always a little nervous when I met my clients for the first time. I always wondered will they stare at my lip? Will they ask questions? I have to be honest I’m not one of those people that enjoys someone pointing my lip out and asking what happened. I truly don’t like to talk about it. I try to ignore it but it’s there.
My husband well he’s pretty amazing. He had a horrific accident 20 years ago. A machine he was working on amputated half of his arm ( Click to read) Even though he wears a prosthetic arm if someone asks him what happened he doesn’t mind. I mean he’s totally fine with that. It doesn’t upset him at all. Me, well I hate it. I have friends that I’ve known for years and they’ve never asked me about my lip, ever. I’m thankful for that.
When I was pregnant with my daughter I prayed to God that she would not inherit my birth defect. I didn’t want her to get teased or bullied as I was. When my husband handed her to me after she was born I saw that her lips were perfect. I was so happy I can’t tell you how happy I was to see her perfect lips.
Last summer I went to speak in front of my peers at a seminar. I wasn’t nervous about getting up in front of people to speak. But I was worried about what they would think about how I look. Were they listening to me or just looking at my lip. I’m always self conscious when meeting people for the first time. Even when I’m out and about it’s always on my mind. What will people think about the way I look. One way I try to hide it is by smiling a lot. Smiling makes my scar and lip less noticeable.
So why am I telling you all of this? Well when I started my blog for a while I never wanted to share my photo of myself. I wasn’t confident in myself. The internet is a big scary place. Some people feel the need to point out imperfections. But I decided I needed to put a face with my blog. I really feel that doing that connects me with you. If you were reading this story and you never saw my face well you’d probably wonder what does she look like, am I right?
Recently I decided to start a Youtube channel. I have to tell you I love creating videos. I love being able to share a painting technique or decorating tips. I even enjoy sharing makeup tips and skincare. This was really scary for me because it’s not just a photo of me, but me talking. That’s when I feel my lip can stand out a little more.
One thing I’ve had to do because I basically have no upper lip is I over draw my lip to make it look like I have one. But when I’m filming the lights are very reflective and it makes my lip stand out more making it even more noticeable. The lights always make my scar stand out a little more too. So I’ve been playing with the lights to try and disguise my lip. Recently I’ve had a few comments like I love your videos but you’re lip liner is so distracting, or you’re lighting is way off you’re too washed out. The reason for this has been explained above. I’ve been trying to disguise my lip as much as possible. I mean I know you see it, but I’m trying to make it less noticeable. And by the way those of you that left those comments I want to thank you. I’m glad that you said something. I needed to be upfront with you and not hide behind the camera and lights. Your comments helped me to share this with you so thank you.
People think that because you “Put yourself out there” they have a right to critique. And I’m not talking about someone mentioning my lip liner or the lighting. I’m talking about someone being nasty about my deformaty. It hasn’t happened yet, but I’m waiting for it to happen. Being bullied most of my life I’ve learned to turn on the defensive.
I’m working on getting more comfortable in front of the camera so please be patient with me. I’m trying to figure out the lighting so you can see me better and I feel more comfortable. I guess that’s why I fell in love with makeup. Even though it doesn’t totally hide my flawed lip, for me it makes it a little less noticeable. It gives me confidence when I’m out in public. And truth be told I would love to have something done to fix it a little more. I’m going to talk to my dermatologist for a few options. I don’t know when I will be able to do it because it will be costly. But before I get too old I would love to have it fixed so I can walk with real confidence instead of walking with my head down.
So there you have it the story of me. I wish I could tell a younger person that has this birth defect that over time things get better as far as confidence, but I can’t. I think it’s the fact that I was bullied so much. I still hate the way my lip looks. I wish I could be someone like Lizzie Velasquez. Even though she was born without adipose tissue, she’s had her challenges with her health. But when I look at her I think she’s beautiful. I think that comes from her confidence. I do feel more confident that I was as a teen. But I still have a part of me that’s not confident. I guess that’s why I’ve had issues with the lighting. I know I need to let it go, and maybe after putting this out there it’s part of the healing process that I can start learning out to let go.
It was hard to do but I shared this on a video. You can watch it below.
I see a beautiful woman with gorgeous hair, eyes and skin.
Anne, I never noticed your lip, you are a very attractive lady! I was made fun of as a child and picked on because of my father and his abuse of my brothers and me as kids! Thank God as we grew up it somewhat stopped! It leaves a mental scar of being called names by others and then going home from school to more mental and physical abuse!
I am an adult of 59 years old and have my own flower and gift shop, something that I had always dreamed of since I was a child and my Mom (God res her soul) had always encouraged me and was my rock! Now my husband of 8 years had also encouraged me to pursue my floral career and share my designs with others!
Long story short, I believe when abused or afflicted with anything and we are made fun of or bullied, we should take and use that experience to the good and just show others that their meanness can gives more determination to conquer what we set out too as you have done and I and countless others have done!
Very heart warming story… keep up what you are doing!
Your Blog Friend:
Linda Bouder/ Lucy’s Custom Silk Floral Designs & Weddings
Chambersburg, Pa. 17202
I think you so so beautiful!. What a story .thankyou for sharing ..and your husband…wow.love you andkeep on sharig.we are all mostly shy and have things aboutourselves that keep us from doing certain things that prohibit us from reaching our true potential..love to you
NOW THAT TOOK COURAGE! YOU ARE GORGEOUS, & INSPIRING! I FEEL FOR YOU & WHAT YOU WENT THROUGH, BUT I THINK IT MADE YOU STRONG, AWARE, & COMPASSIONATE! SO, I WISH YOU MANY BLESSINGS & ALL THE BEST! THANK YOU FOR SHARING! I WAS VERY MOVED BY IT!
Dear Anne, please don’t let what those bullies in school define you for the rest of your life. You are so beautiful. Your face, your figure and yes your makeup are all impeccable. You have this wonderful blog and people are interested in what you have to say. May I suggest you go visit a therapist and talk out all these hurt feelings you have bottled up inside. I promise that the more you talk, the better you will feel. Life is too short to be carrying around such a heavy load. Please keep sharing with us. We care . By the way I love your hair color. Lol
You’re beautiful. If you hadn’t been bullied you’d know that. Bullies strip us bare and their words leave scars far deeper than any physical imperfection ever could. If you hadn’t been bullied and people hadn’t mentioned your lip it may annoy you a bit as anything less than perfection annoys us sometimes but it wouldn’t cut into your soul the way it does.. I know this because I was bullied terribly. Believe me wehen I say truly, you’re beautiful.
Dear Anne,
I have been following your blog for some time now.. I save them all in a folder on my email in case I’m not able to read them right away.. I really enjoy them!
In all this time, I have never noticed your “defect”! It’s hard to accept the fact that people are so critical! I guess that’s just human nature. Bullying has always been a huge problem.. Our new First Lady, Melanie Trump, is going to make it her #1 priority to address the problem!
You are a lovely lady who tries to help people decorate and should never be criticized!
First of all I just want to say thank you for sharing your deepest heart. You are a beautiful woman who is not defined by your cleft. I have a 25 year old son that was born with a bilateral cleft lip and pallet. BUT we chose him…we adopted him from Korea and went through LOTS of surgeries over the years. I understand what you went through…except I am the mom. Just by being open you are helping others except themselves and others.
Thanks and Blessings to you, Maggie
Anne, you are a stunningly beautiful woman on the outside, and from the tender heart that comes through in your blog, beautiful on the inside, too. I am sorry that you grew up around people that did not appreciate you and I am so glad that you found at such an early age someone who did. I don’t want to get into my issues but I do want to say this: You would be amazed at the number of people all around you who feel the same way about some aspect of their body/life that you do about your lip. By opening up to all of us, I believe you will not find ridicule or judgment but only compassion, support and gratitude for being such a wonderful example for the rest of us. God bless you. I wish I could just give you a hug. You are beautiful.
You are a very pretty lady, I never even noticed anything until you pointed it out. It just look like a little scar. Everyone has things that they don’t like about themselves. No one is perfect.
Dear Anne,
Thank you for sharing your story, and I am terribly sorry that we live in a world where you needed to do so. I wish we were further evolved and so accepting of one another that our imperfections are what made us see each other as perfection.
I want you to know that what I see in you is a lovely talented woman who I admire very much, not a scared lip.
So please just keep turning out your beautiful projects, and bringing all of us along for the ride.
Sincerely,
Wendy
Hello Anne,
I had a brother whowas orn with a cleft pallette and hare lip. He endired cruel jibes as well. You are beautiful outside and In so do not worry ever again You are kind caring Loving and you are a beautiful woman NOT LIKE THOSETHAT BULLIED YOU!!!!You are so inspiring look at the person you have become Congratulations to an inspirational woman. Your web has and blog hasm made it all the way to t Co Armagh N. Ireland where i live.
Can you r bullies say they have achieved this,
Once again Congratulatios on your splecdid blogs web and you tube Presentations.
God bless for now from Kathleen Teresa Heath
I hear what you’re saying but honestly, you’re really a beautiful lady.
I was a speech therapist for many years and I saw plenty of children with cleft lips/palate, all kinds of things. You look wonderful and I know this from experience. I know you can’t forget about it, but I hope you will continue to entertain us with confidence, beauty, and fresh ideas. I can guarantee you that when I look at your picture and your ideas, the last thing on my mind will be your lip. You are beautiful and wonderful just as you are. Carry On!
You are a very beautiful woman with great talent! You should be so proud and be able to look anyone in the eye!
You Are BEAUTIFUL! & BRAVE for standing up to those who might have bullied you. Love you & Your work!
Years ago I went into a tanning salon because us redheads we don’t tan 🙂 The very young women at the desk had the most gorgeous smile and I commented on it. Tears came to her eyes and I said “O babe I didn’t mean to make you cry what’s wrong are you ok?” She said you have no idea how much that means to me I was born with a hair lip. Being me I didn’t really know what that meant for her but she had waited till she was 21 to have plastic surgery and I think in her case she also had her pallet broken because of her teeth. “Well you have a beautiful smile now. ” “was it hard when you were a kid” She said ” It was horrible ” I could see in her eyes it was true. I am so sorry you had to go thru something like that. I think something like that probably makes you a deeper feeling and more empathetic person. However PTSD is probably common. I used to think I was being picked on when people mentioned my freckles and red hair I can’t imagine hurting so deeply as a child let alone an adult.
You are a beautiful lady! I hope you tell yourself that every day! Hugs,
Hi Anne, I have met you up close and personal and never once did I notice anything! Or on camera either 🙂
If you hadn’t mentioned it, I’m not sure I would have noticed anything wrong with your lip. Your eyes are so beautiful and you have a pretty face. The more we concentrate on something the bigger deal we make it. Honey, forgeddaboutit!!! You are so pretty!
Anne,
Since I began receiving your emails, I have always thought how adorable you are. . But I do know, that unless we have walked in one’s shoes, we cannot understand where they have been. i am sad for all of the hurt you have experienced,. You are a beautiful inspiration for all of us❣
Ilene
In one of your makeup videos I noticed your lip and thought you had probably had a cleft palate, but I remember thinking how lovely you are . I was thrilled to see you without makeup showing your bare face and I admired your confidence and poise. Your lip is such a tiny part of the whole you. Add up all your blessings: pretty face, great hair, fabulous skin, terrific figure, charming personality, design savvy, ease in front of a camera, and you will see what we all see- one pretty amazing lady.
Sorry, I never noticed it and that doesn’t make you, what is inside is what counts. You are beautiful!
Smile and don’t give it another thought.
Cathy
I have not been following you for that long and one of the first things that I watched was your makeup tutorial and I thought then how brave and confident you were. Keep up the good work, you are so beautiful inside and out!
Dear Anne:
It’s so funny to me that you should write about this. I was a coordinator of a cleft lip and palate and facial reconstruction clinic. We saw lots of babies, children, teenagers, and adults with these issues. I can understand that life has been challenging for you. Our world these days is very judgemental at times and the definition of beauty is insane. I’ve never noticed your lip. I’m sure you do feel self conscious about it but I think you look awesome. Please don’t let someone’s negative comments define who you are. You are strong. You are beautiful. You’re an overcomer! You have so very much to be proud of.
Oh sweet Anne,
I have never met you in person but I would have never know, or cared. Dear lady we all have a defect in some way. Some are noticeable and some are hidden. I think you are beautiful, and anyone who would bully or tease you (especially an adult) is ugly both inside and out. You be you – the beautiful Anne I know and love and respect. xxoo, Barb
Hard to believe people can be so cruel. You are a beautiful person – I have never noticed your lips because I can’t get past looking at those beautiful eyes!
You are so beautiful….inside and out!!
Anne… I’m sitting here with tears in my eyes. I am so sorry for the way people have treated you because of your lip. It hurts my heart that people can be so cruel. I have always looked at you and thought ” Wow she is gorgeous ! ” Your eyes and hair are what I see on you. I guess we really never know what others think of themselves… I always wished I was as talented and courageous as you are. You are so brave to share all of your projects and inspire us. I would be scared to death to do that. PLEASE, PLEASE do not ever feel ashamed of yourself as you said you sometimes feel. I know we as women can’t help worrying about our appearances… and it makes our lives harder than it has to be. But it’s who we are. You have been gifted with so much and you share that … That is true beauty. The kind of people who would be that cruel are the flawed ones… they must have such unhappiness in themselves. If I thought you were brave before.. I think you’re even more so now. And you know if you ever need to vent your frustrations… you have a whole lot of us out here that would be there for you. Keep smiling Beautiful ! xo
I get it. When I was 16 years old I had a pretty bad car accident. The right side of my face was ripped from chin line to scalp. I was lucky that I had a fantastic reconstructive surgeon. However, reconstructive surgery takes time, generally multiple episodes and is often like a painting piece of furniture – it looks worse before it gets better. I am ‘more than satisfied’ with the results when I look in a mirror. Surgery does not repair the emotional scars that I received before or during reconstruction; those never got away. I still have raw memories of frequently being asked if had been mauled by a tiger, lion, bear, or whatever during my late teenaged years. Now approaching my 7th decade on this earth, I know that the reflection we most often seen the mirror is not the physical one, it is the emotional one that has been erected over may years. In addition, I suffered a significant TBI. I now jumble words in a sentence, when speaking, as well as thinking I have completed the sentence when I have only spoken about a third of it. I still freak at the thought of public speaking; I do not want to be in the spotlight. I think people see my scars, with physical and verbal. I get it. I understand. you are brave; you are strong; you are worthy.
Gurrl, share the name of that lipstick! I need it in my life! And btw you look fabulous 🙂
Anne you are a very beautiful lady. I never noticed your lip or scar. I know it took courage for you to talk about it. I’m sorry you were treated badly. We all have things on our body’s we try to cover up. It’s what’s in the heart that counts and I can tell you have a beautiful heart. No worries, take care and God Bless.
Kudos to you for getting it out there…I have had comments about me when I was younger also. When I was born, I had a birthmark on my forehead. As I grew, the birthmark moved up into my hairline. But, guess what, no hair grew on it! The area was about the size of a quarter. I have always had to comb my hair in a way to cover it. Every time we were outside at school, I would have to guard the hair or the wind would blow it away from my bald area. How embarrassed I was when someone would notice and say, ” What is that?” Back in 1987 I had it removed because a Dermatologist biopsied it and pathology came back saying that it was the kind of birthmark that could become malignant. Great, that is what I needed! Removed it after having a plastic surgeon separate my scalp from my skull to slide it over the chunk that had been removed. Now I have a scar from my forehead circling around to the backside of my backside of my ear. Can I live with that? You betcha! Keep on trucking….I can’t do what you can do!
Well, we all have something don’t we. I have congenital shortening of the metacarpals and tarsals, which means my toes and fingers are odd sized. I never noticed until I was 11 and some well meaning adult asked me what the heck was wrong. after that it was all I saw. I have never went barefoot or even sockless again and I am 60.
If I was as pretty as you, I’d be flauntin’ it all over the place! 😉 We are all such critics of our own looks, much more than others are – except maybe for stupid bullies. Don’t even give them any of your space – in your heart or your head!
Thank you for sharing this with us but honestly, I never even noticed. So there 😉
I think you looked beautiful on the video. And you have a beautiful, brave heart. God bless you!
Until you said something I never noticed. You are beautiful inside and out and have a great life. YOU have a great blog and I really like all you do. None of us are really perfect but I do understand you and love you.
Sweetie, I never noticed either I just can’t get past your big beautiful eyes! So pretty. Don’t be so hard on yourself, look at how brave you are to do this video. I’ll keep reading your wonderful blog I always enjoy it.
~ ~ Ahrisha~ ~
I watched the video after I read your post. So I knew about your lip. I did not notice anything wrong with your lip. You are very attractive.
That took guts! And thank you for sharing! You have heard it before–you are beautiful, inside and out, and just look at what you have accomplished! You are amazing. A lot of us have some malady that bothers us, like I have hair loss on the back of my head. I have tried powders to color my scalp, regrowth hair products that don’t work for me, wigs, which make my head itch. Comb-overs, etc. I have decided–to heck with it! My friends know that bald spot doesn’t define me. When strangers stare, I glumly stare back til they get red in the face and look away, embarrassed. Same when strangers comment either within ear shoot or to my face.. No words are needed, just the stare! Sometimes I giggle to myself—they look so funny……..
Hi Anne,
I’m new to your blog and FB postings. Thank you for them all.
I think you are a beautiful, sincere, strong and talented lady. I’m sorry you had to suffer with peoples ignorance. They are the ones with problems, not you. I can only hope they learn to find kindness and love in themselves and not fault of others or dicrimination for looking unique or different.
I will look forward to reading your blogs and now knowing how lovely you really are inside and out.
Your newest fan,
Sheron Davis xo
You are not only talented you are beautiful. Thanks for sharing both.
You are beautiful. Don’t let anyone tell you different. Always remember when someone makes unkind comments that it says nothing about you but speaks volumes about them. You are brave. I will keep you in my prayers.
Thanks for sharing your story. Like all those before and those who will follow in the comments, you’re absolutely beautiful. I throughly enjoy myself when I spend a little time here with you whether it’s beauty or decor. One of my favs. Thanks again for keeping it real girlfriend
Oh, Anne, this was wonderful. As a woman who also has a disability which is extremely visible, i totally can relate to your experiences. However, I believe that these experiences, while demoralizing and very upsetting, that they have also made me a stronger woman in the long run. Yes, there are times i just want to cry and say it’s not fair, and i’m over it and someone else can have my disability, but if i didn’t have my disability i wouldn’t have my two wonderful adopted girls from Russia, and now I’m a grandma, so i’m blessed. I have a wonderful family and friends who don’t notice my disability and to those that do and ask me questions, i just simply say “it’s part of my package!”
Thank you for sharing.
Jane in NZ
My sweet friend Anne, bless your beautiful heart! I know how hard and how painful writing this must have been for you. Please, believe me, I have followed your blog for so long and watched your Youtube videos over and over again and NEVER have I EVER noticed that you suffered from a cleft palate, much less noticed a scar! Your personality is so bright, your heart so light and your face so beautiful, if there is something there, you have 10x more beauty that outshines what you believe your readers and watchers might see. I ache for you.
My turn. In my left eye, I have what is called a coloboma of the iris. I was born with it, but because babies eyes are so dark, my Mother didn’t notice it until I was a few months old. She was feeding me, saw it and screamed for my Dad. In short, while the eye is developing in utero, a coloboma forms in the iris which doesn’t allow it to completely close around the pupil. So instead of having a pupil in my left eye, it looks like I have a large black keyhole that goes from the center of my iris down to where the white part begins. I have one bright blue eye and one mottled blue-grey-green eye with a big black spot. I was the butt of bullying,, jokes and even shunned by some of the little girl groups I wanted to belong to and play with so much. Throughout high school, college and even now, when people notice it, they look at me aghast. It wasn’t but 6-8 months ago when I was seeking assistance at a Sephora store that a young sales associate looked me in the eyes and put her hand over her mouth and said “Oh my God, something is going on with your eye, do you know that?!” I walked out of the store., humiliated! I found my husband in the mall and started crying stinging tears, which made me even more mad because when I was about 12 years old I promised myself that I was NEVER going to let anyone make me cry about my eye AGAIN. I guess what got me was that here I am, over 50 years old , and this little snot made such a rude and ignorant comment so that everyone around could hear with no regard for my feelings whatsoever! My husband is the most precious man in the world. When we began dating I immediately explained to him about my eye. I told him I could only see light and occasional color out of it.. The only thing he ever said was “Until I get used to it, don’t be offended if it looks like I’m only looking at your right eye when I;m talking to you and oh yes, I think your eyes are beautiful.” We were married eight months later. I am still quite self-conscious about me eye, I tend to refrain from looking at a person right in the eyes when I am speaking to them, but I have a great doctor I’ve been in therapy with who is helping me get past that.
You are fabulous and beautiful and gorgeous with a charming smile, it is the most beautiful smile you could ever ask for, it says, “Welcome, I’m glad you’re here.” I’m proud to call you my special blog friend! 🙂
My dear friend…I never saw anything. You are beautiful…bless you for your courage to share. I’m so proud of you! Xo Susie from The Chelsea Project
I have bags under my eyes — not the little cute things that some actress have but huge, bulgy bags that are almost as big as my eyes themselves. I grew up being bullied, too. “Sack eyes,” and, “She’s not so bad if you put a sack over her head (said in front of me). From boyfriends I got, “you’d look better if. (fill in the blank).
I was in my mid-30’s when my grandmother passed away. She left me $5,000 in her will. The first thing my mother said was, “Now you can afford plastic surgery on the bags under your eyes.”
I used the money to have a new central air conditioner installed in my house. That’s when I realized I didn’t care anymore but it was hard growing up having people (boys and girls) make fun of me .
I’m 65 years old. Two weeks ago I married a man who thinks I’m beautiful. He loves me just as I am. It took me a long time to find someone who doesn’t criticize me and I’ve never been happier.
You are so lucky to have found a man who loves you as you are. Would that I could have met him when I was younger.
Blessings to you,
Linda
Hold your head up! You are so pretty! Very brave too! Keep doing your own thing!
Oh my goodness, I never noticed your lip before. You are truly a stunning woman! I’m sorry you have been treated so badly. It’s a shame people have to be so hateful and hurtful in order to build themselves up, and feel better. Thank you for being so brave and sharing your story.
You are stunning! Don’t believe any less. I do understand about the harassment, the bullying. I went thru it as a child and adult. The worst of it as an adult in my 6th decade of life and all due to gossip circulating about me. You are a beautiful young woman. Hugs and prayers. All the best!
Thank you so much for sharing your story. Just as everyone has been saying, you are truly a beautiful woman. You are so full of energy and you radiate a glow! I too was teased most of my childhood for being so skinny. To this day 30 plus years later I still have self image issues. I have an idea where you are coming from. I have always wanted to start a YouTube channel or blog. I have been too ashamed to ever want to be on camera for so many people to see. You bravery has given me confidence that I may one day be able to overcome this myself. Thank you again. I can’t wait to see more of you.
I have watched many of your videos and have never noticed anything different. This may seem funny to you but I have thought you look terrific and wished I could I had your great looks. I guess no matter how we look we see things about ourselves nobody else sees. Thanks for sharing and I wish peace in your heart that you realize you are fine and a beautiful person.
Anne, are you kidding me? You are gorgeous and have spectacular hair, skin and a body to die for! Bury the past and move forward with WHatever you want to do! Boo Hiss on anyone with a negative comment. Remove them from your subscription list! Best wishes, Janet George
I watched your video after I read your post. You are my definition of superhero. A very beautiful superhero who is just as beautiful outside as she is inside!
Thank you for your post. You are a beauty. You are creative. You are amazing at sharing your ideas and knowledge. My daughter was born with an obvious feature that she was teased about throughout school AND into adulthood. She decided to get it corrected and is happy she finally has her ears pinned back. I got a burn on my face as an infant. It was a steam burn from a hot iron. It hasn’t been a big deal for me until my skin has started to age. One eye droops a bit more, my upper lip has some damaged skin and one side of my jaw droops and is lumpy. Mostly people notice my droopy eye. I saw a girl at my kids school who had a severe burn on her face. The type of scarring that you know you shouldn’t stare at but you can’t help but look. She had no choice but to go out in the world and live her life. After that, I didn’t think as much about my scars. Sounds like you have a wonderful family and an exciting passion for decor, design and fashion. You are living a life many only dream about. Hide your lip if you feel you should. But, no matter what, you will still be the same creative, loving, beauty that you are right now.
I hate to admit it, but I never noticed. But what I did notice, is you are a beautiful and talented woman. Keep it up! You are amazing! God Bless you and you family! I enjoy the pictures you share also.
You are a beautiful perso, keep on keeping on!
All I see is a beauyiful woman, with a beautiful heart.. Nothing but beauty here…glad you. Spoke about it and got it off your chest….But was tolally not necessary ….Hope you feel better…
Hi Anne, I want to share with you too. First of all I would give just about anything to look like you, lip and all.
You see, I am a forty nine year old woman who has lived from Jr High until now with excessive body hair. I even have a full dark beard like a man. I have tried everything under the sun to get rid of it; the amount of money that I have spent is crazy. All to no avail. So, I have to get up and shave my beard everyday and hope and pray that I take doesn’t grow out enough during the day for people to notice. My activities are restricted due to this ( camping, overnight trips, sharing rooms, etc.). I have been called the teenage werewolf, the bearded woman and so much more. When I was dating I would always pull back if a guy tried to caress my face or neck for fear he would feel the hair stuble. When I was married I was scared to death my husband would walk in and see me shaving. Hair face, legs, arms; sometimes I think that God was going to make me a man got distracted and carried on making me a woman. I have been angry with God a lot for allowing me to be born this way. My self esteem is so low it is now where to be found and I just know that there is not a man out
there that wants a hairy woman.
I hide too every day. I guess I’m telling you all this to say it could be so much worse. But in return I have not walked in your shoes.
Please, please know that you are beyond beautiful. I would trade my facial hair for your beautiful lips any day.
I pray blessing of peace, comfort, and joy in your beauty. Thank you for sharing and being so vulnerable.
I’ve honestly never noticed Anne, nor would I care if I did. You are a beautiful lady both inside and out and your lovely personality shines brighter than any scar. We all adore you for YOU!! I applaud you for bravely putting yourself out there and discussing something that is difficult for you. I hope you feel the love and support from your readers today xx
When your video popped up my very first thought was – WOW, what a pretty woman! I would have never noticed that you weren’t flawless. As I listened to your heartfelt message I thought how similar I have felt due to obesity. Even the medical community can make you feel like a less worthy human being and don’t even talk about flying on a plane! Obesity can’t be covered up by anything – not makeup not clothing. I am not my weight but many times people will not get beyond the weight to get to know me as a human being! Thank you for sharing and know that I see you as beautiful both inside and out!
Anne – thank you for sharing your heart and your soul. I saw your Facebook post about a secret you were hiding and came over here to read about it. I’ve seen you in person. More than once. All I’ve seen is someone with a kind and beautiful face. I’m being completely honest. Had you not shared this on your blog, I would’ve never known. You are one of the kindest, nicest bloggers I’ve met. You’re genuine and sincere, and your beauty radiates both inside and out. And now I’m adding bravery to your list of strengths. I’m so impressed that you’ve stepped out of your comfort zone to share how you’ve felt for years. This post will be amazing inspiration for many women and girls for years to come. Bless you, friend!
I never noticed your lip. I just saw a very attractive woman. I understand how it bothers you, though. My ears stick out – one more than the other. I never knew that this was a problem until I went to school. Boy, do the other kids let you know if there is anything about you that isn’t the norm. So, I learned to hide my ears. No ponytails, swept back hairstyles or up-do’s for me. There are people who have known me for years who have never seen my ears. If I had the money available I would go to a plastic surgeon and have them fixed. However, my husband doesn’t want me to do it. My ears have never bothered him. They only bother me so I get what you are feeling. You are truly a lovely woman. The real scar is inside of you from the taunts you endured. Let it heal.
All I see when I watch your videos is your beautiful eyes and those long, long lashes. My lashes are short so I always notice beautiful eyes and long lashes. The people who say mean and cruel things have low self-esteem problems and they only feel good about themselves if they are putting someone else down. Hold your head up high because you are a beautiful woman!
Thank you for sharing your story.
I am so sorry that you are hurting. People can be cruel.
Gosh, how were they brought up.
Honestly, I never noticed. You are very pretty, sweet and unique.
Thanks for all your beautiful thoughts and ideas.
Oh, Anne I see nothing but beauty when I see pictures of you. I’m so sorry about the bullying and all you had to deal with. Adults who bully other adults (or children) are the worst. Big hugs to you…I think you’re amazing. TBH, I, too struggle with confidence issues. I was an only child so the parent that did the bullying to me never had a witness…so my confidence issues manifested into many forms. For a long time I stuttered. I speak slowly and clearly now for a reason but it takes a huge amount of concentration for me to get through a video. It’s affected many of my relationships. That same adult continues to bully me to this day. I sometimes have periods where I fear going out in public! This is why blogging has become my sanctuary. I’m sharing something here on a comment that I’ve never even shared on my own blog…but I wanted you to know you’re 100000% supported by me – one of your biggest fans. xo
Anne,
You radiant the the spirit from within you. Your beautiful and quite honestly I have never noticed any difference in your lips. You are brave to bring your issue in front of your life. I am proud to be a friend of such a courageous woman.
Sending you lovilove hugs,
Karen Marie
You are a beautiful woman! God has made us all with some form of deform but you are a strong woman and may he continue to give you and your family the strength and love. God bless
People can be insensitive and cruel as you well know. I have psoriasis and I never know when a great big angry red scaly patch is going to pop up seemingly over night….I wear long sleeves and long pants in the summer heat because I can’t stand people staring at me. It’s genetic and non contagious but people don’t automatically know that and they stare or inch away. I can’t wear dark colours because it’s on my scalp and my skin sheds very fast so it looks like I have horrible dandruff even though my hair is clean. I understand your pain and for you to go public on the Internet takes huge courage and strength. I admire you so much. I certainly won’t read a blog more or less based on what someone looks like but in your case I may make an exception!
Well done!
I think you would not have become the incredible person you are today if not for the horrors you lived through and rose from.
You are an inspiration for everyone, and especially for the young children. You can give them hope.
Anne I have never noticed anything about you except that you are funny and confident and approachable. Its hard trying to be perfect, and this world has no one that meets that standard anyway. I think a lot of women struggle with the way they look, and that is without a real reason like you had growing up into adulthood. So kudos to you for sharing. And now that we are all aging, its another challenge, but I will try to be kind to myself, because we all get to go down that road if we are lucky enough.
Anne, I wish I could give you some words of wisdom but your friends & followers have said it all! Thanks for sharing your story. You are a strong, inspirational person.
Hugs
What a beautiful, wonderful woman. Such an inspiration!!
Your one of Creators special chosen ones sent here to teach us through example…
Thank you for being you…
Your beautiful, never noticed anything. Hugs. My flaws are abundant, but I think that’s where my beauty is. As no 2 trees are the same but are all beautiful.
Anne, you are astonishingly beautiful inside and out, and you are very brave. Honestly I have never noticed your scar. The fact that you hold no anger towards the bullies shows God’s grace on your life. It is a fact that when you forgive you are the one set free. Anne you have so much to offer to others and the world needs your gifts. Keep doing what you’re doing. I leave you with a quote I just saw yesterday by Gordon B. Hinckley. I believe it’s for you. “In all of living have much fun and laughter. Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured.”
Dear Anne,
First of all, you are such an amazingly beautiful woman this is almost shocking to hear. I would have never noticed any imperfection because you’re so very pretty and you’re videos are so fun; who would have time to notice anything else? But I do hope that talking about it brings you some peace as I’ve found in my life that sometimes just talking about something and getting it out there helps with healing more than anything else. I am so sorry to hear you have hurt for so long; no one should ever feel like that and I’m sorry for your pain. But please know most of us out there only think how pretty and fun you are and never give anything else a second thought.
Kindly,
Jenna
I never noticed. All I saw and still see, is a beautiful woman who has the courage to follow a dream. And you are my hero for doing that and
giving the rest of us these wonderful ideas for our homes.
anne, my husband has beutiful lips too. as a child he too was bullied. Then I came along with my odd arm, I have really weird elbows but I can use them and all is well. I so understand the bully, The kids would call me chicken arm because honestly that’s what they look like. When I had my lst child my husband was scared to death she would have his lips(he had to have 5 surgerys as a youngster). Then we where told she was special needs. My poor husband, he doesn’t believe in Jesus and doesn’t have faith. I knew God wouldn’t give us more then we could handle. They suggessed I get a abordion. I said no way. She was born 25 years ago and she’s beautiful, I’m blessed with 2 beautiful girls. But she does have my arms and I have always told her God just took more time with us to creat. The same with you and everyone else who isn’t so called perfect. God made us perfect in His image. You are so beautiful and I never even noticed your beautiful lips. Love in Christ Brenda
Hi Anne. I am trying to catch up on posts and just saw your story and video today. All I see is a beautiful lady with an important story. Be proud of your honesty and strength.
Thank you Anne for sharing your personal struggle with us. The truth, as you will come to realize, is that we all see you as beautiful and inspiring and fun! If it has helped you to “let go” and begin to love yourself more, then that is a wonderful thing too. You inspire so easily with your posts and blog. Be kinder to yourself as you walk through your life. Obviously your husband and daughter are proof that you are loved and cherished for just being you. Now smile girl and get on with life! God bless you!
Anne, You ARE beautiful! I hardly see it! I didn’t even notice it until you pointed it out! I understand some of your pain. I was born with a large brown birthmark on the back of my inner thigh. I was teased as a child and many said it looks like I had poop on my leg. I hated to wear shorts because my birthmark would show. If I had shorts on, I would walk around a crowd in a different direction so I could hide my inner right thigh. This truly affected my body image growing up. So I understand how this affects you. Mine was on my leg and could be hidden easier than your lip. You are strong and amazing for talking about this! Hugs to you!
Anne,
Girl you are beautiful, I mean beautiful!! Don’t ever forget that. I, for one have never noticed your lip, I have always thought how pretty you are!! Another thing, You are created in our Heavenly Fathers Image! You were created by Him for His pleasure and Glory! In His eyes you are PERFECT! Because God don’t make no Junk!!. As he says (Isaiah 49: 15,16) “And I the Lord can’t forget you. Look I have carved your name into my hand, I think about you all the time!” Anne, don’t forget you only need to Please Him not Man. Man or Woman. Humans are filled with blemishes and sin which are bigger imperfections! So just remember who you need to worry about pleasing! You are special, beautiful, and write an amazing blog!! Be blessed Girl!!
I watched this and felt your emotions. I have strong feelings about this video and your ‘shame’ is overwhelming. I cried when you cried. I feel our imperfections can drive our creativity and love of beauty, though. I never noticed anything but the beauty. You have compensated well in providing us with your beautiful ideas at great cost to your sensitivity. I really hope you can somehow find peace with all that you went through to finally get to this point. Know you are loved, really feel it. And you are beautiful inside and out.
You are beautiful inside and out. For me it has been my teeth. I did not get the very large buck-teeth like my Mom had before she married. She got dentures and only the top fit her. So her face revealed that she only had top teeth. My sister got her buck -teeth and she married and later on had dentures. So I make sure if a picture is taken , I smile a certain way. We are God’s vessels created in the Image of God; God sees our heart and sees our beauty but we allow ourselves to look at something that I am sure is not a flaw in God’s eyes. You have a powerful testimony, and it reveals how God has carried you through heart -ache, bullies, and has become so strong you can share your story. Your beauty shines and it gives strength and hope to others. Thank you for being so transparent. Blessings Linda
As an individual born with a Unilateral Cleft palate/lip…I understand EVERY word you said. I learned as a child how to deal with bullies with help from my mother. I was also in a terrible car accident when I was 8 years old – I hit the windshield with my face. Alright! New scars! (Sarcasm).
Pig nose, scarface, flatnose, pinky, bunny boy…I heard them ALL.
By the way, you are a beautiful woman. ALWAYS keep your chin up! NEVER be ashamed. Bullies are just secretly jealous.